dear future self,

please be reminded that all boys are shit. 90% of the time they just wanna get into your pants, fuck you and not talk to you again. please be mindful and stop falling for such idiots.

in addition, please please please stop hooking up with twins. they fuck with your mind. you also need to stop hooking up with the tennis boys, they all have small dicks. no kidding.

also, you need to start studying. you’ve partied 3 out of the last 5 days. how you will maintain your grades this semester is questionable.

lastly, your efforts for staying in and not partying paid off last semester. maybe you should just stick to that formula.

lotsa love

drunken jo from the school-boys-school-girls party.

P.S: Fucking stop smoking.